[Career coaching tips] How to kill your own career change program in cold blood

Time for a change. Maybe you’re forced by a layoff or industry shift. Or you’re just reaching your own personal end of the line.

The most common ways I’ve seen clients sabotage their moves are slow planning, fast action and taking the middle too seriously.

Slow planning: These days career planning (which includes decisions about leaving the corporate world for a business, sabbatical or school) is year-round and never-ending. How can you become more marketable? What options will be open if you move to a new city or retire? How can you create a Plan B in case your comfortable life gets interrupted?

Some clients call me when they hear an early whisper of change. We begin to plan early and usually they find a new job faster than they anticipated. But others wait till they’ve been laid off and they’ve used up a good chunk of severance and savings. Now they’re under pressure. So they often end up sabotaging themselves with ...

Fast action: When you’re feeling scared or pressured, it’s easy to grab the nearest opportunity that appears to be a life raft. Sometimes that’s a good idea: a hastily-accepted job often becomes a doorway to your dream. But a hastily-chosen option usually creates new challenges. You move to a new city because “living costs will be lower” or “there are more jobs,” and now you’re stranded. You hire a service that promises fast results or sign up for a training program that costs a lot and delivers little; now you’re exhausted and depleted your reserves.

Taking the middle too seriously: Between your current life and your Dream Career lies a territory called The Middle. I distinguish two kinds of Middle Jobs: a perch job and a bridge job.

You take a perch job because you need money. Like birds resting on the high wires during migration season, you need a place to land until you can get moving in the direction you want to go. So you might serve cappuccino at Starbucks, clerk in a retail store, or teach a class here and there. You might even opt for self-employment as a cat sitter or get a real estate license.

A bridge job gives you skills and contacts to move to your dream. You want to move from engineering to marketing. Your engineering job disappeared so you grab a marketing or sales job. Maybe the pay is lower or the conditions less than ideal, but after a year or two you get to write “Marketing” on your resume and go for the gold.

Sometimes a perch job becomes a bridge job, or vice versa. Sometimes a Middle Job morphs into your ideal and you realize you’ve reached the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, even while you thought you were caught in a thunderstorm.

But don’t take Middle Jobs too seriously. I’ve watched career changers detour to company politics and special projects on jobs that should have been treated lightly. Or they turn down a Middle Job because “it’s not exactly what I want.”

Ninety percent of the time, you’re better off with a job than without one. Just do enough to get by, get a reputation for being nice and friendly, and stay focused on your goal.

No goal? You’re more likely to stumble across one while you’re doing something – anything – rather than sitting on the couch, introspecting and filling out “who am I” forms. Serendipity has become an accepted term in mainstream career management articles. And that calls for more action than assessment.

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Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D., is a published author, speaker, and career/business consultant. She coaches
midlife professinals who want to win the First Inning of their Second Career. 
Download a Fr*e Report: Why most career change fails (and how you can write your own success story).
http://www.cathygoodwin.com/subscribe.html

[Midlife Career Mentoring] responding to an attack (or not)

Recently "Jim" sent me this email:

"My coworker just went on the attack! He sent around messages suggesting that I had dropped the ball on a big project, with copies to my boss and other senior managers. Our company culture places a high value on building consensus and avoiding conflict. So I don’t want to seem argumentative but I want to make sure the decision-makers get the full story."

Jim wanted to write a detailed response. He muttered about hiring a lawyer -- and sometimes that *is* a good idea. But first, I suggested, here are some general considerations:

1. Rise above insulting communications, if at all possible.

Most of the time, you’re ahead of the game if you take the high road. (Hmm...did I just mix a metaphor?)

Let’s face it: if your manager is going to take the word of a coworker (or supplier or customer) against yours, you’ve got a much greater challenge. Maybe it’s time to begin exploring new opportunities.

But sometimes you cannot afford to ignore a message. If you’re supplying a service as an outside vendor, or if you’re accused of unethical or illegal practices, you probably need legal advice.

2. Respond affirmatively, not defensively, if you respond at all.

Unless you’re competing to be Donald Trump’s Apprentice, you’ll usually lose points for finger-pointing. Focus on accomplishments.

3. Discover the reality of the situation.

What has the sender done in the past? Have similar situations arisen? How have they been handled? What was the outcome?

It’s not likely – but possibly everyone who has ever tangled with “Bob” ends up losing her job. Or “Elsie” tests everyone who’s new to the department. Or “Ken” wanted his cousin to win the account.

4. Decipher the hidden message.

When you get any negative business communication, your first question should be, “What’s really going on?” You can never assume, “Disaster!”
nor can you assume, “No big deal – this will go away.”

If you’re not sure, brainstorm with an outsider, especially if the stakes are high. Choose a coach or consultant who will ask you tough questions, encouraging you to view the challenge in a new light.

5. Focus on your future, not current distractions and feelings.

Are you picking up skills to become more marketable?
Will this business relationship enhance your credibility and lead to more lucrative options?
How can you create a new career path that will be meaningful and satisfying?

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Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D., coaches midlife professionals for the First Inning of their Second Career: business, retirement, new career moving, or enjoying more of what you have.
Fr^e report: 5 Reasons Most Career Change Fails (and how to write your own success story)
Click here to get your
copy and your weekly Great Career Moves Ezine

Ready...set..get inspired for your midlife career change

You started out enthused...and now you wonder why you wanted a business in the first place. Or you entered graduate school and now the program seems boring and the classes run together in your mind. Or you began writing a book and you’re bogged down halfway through. Who wants to be a writer (or an artist or entrepreneur) anyway?

1. Why did you embark on this goal in the first place?

Are your reasons still valid? You’ve changed. The world has changed. So maybe now you’re looking for a different path.

I recommend extreme caution before abandoning a goal. But I also encourage clients to invest energy in exploring new possibilities.

Or maybe you got sidetracked. Your original business model called for working three days a week, but you’ve hooked up with a program based on “eighty hour weeks for the rest of your life.”

Good grief. Time to return to the drawing board and design a plan that works for you.

2. Are you following your own dream?

Many of my clients admit they’re following someone else’s dream. Sometimes they’re following a parent’s wish. Sometimes they’re doing “what everybody expects me to do.” And some business owners actually realize they’re implementing their mentor’s ideal business model – not their own.

3. Are you dragging yourself through a step-by-step plan that seems to go on forever?

Return to the idea inspired action: whatever moves you toward your goal, without useless detours, usually with a feeling of ease. In her best-selling book, Excuse Me: Your Life is Waiting, Lynn Grabhorn warns against “heigh-ho silvering,” action that makes you feel busy but gets you nowhere. See
http://www.cathygoodwin.com/amazonbks.html#grabhorn

Maybe you’ve inadvertently chosen the rocky path to climb your own personal mountain. Read a map or hire a guide: you may find a smoother path or even (my favorite) charter a helicopter for the rest of the trip.

More on inspiration:

Your 21-Day Time Management Makeover
http://www.cathygoodwin.com/timebook.html

Robert Middleton’s new program emphasizes the power of intention for businesses – an unusual follow-up to his web tools guide and infoguru manual.
http://tinyurl.com/3sv83

If you liked this article, you’ll love collaborating with Cathy on the First Inning of Your Second Career whether your goal is to survive office politics, take your career in a new direction or consider a Big Break: self-employment, sabbaticals or school.
Discover the 5 reasons most career change fails (and how you can write your own success story).
http://www.cathygoodwin.com/subscribe.html

Midlife career change means looking at time a new way

Have you read any of those know-it-all Time Management books, where you can revolutionize your life and end procrastination with just a few simple steps? Yeah, right. Doesn't work for me either. I wrote my own Time Management Makeover because I believe that we each face time challenges for different reasons. Why do you need to get organized (and maybe you don't)? Why do you need to make the calls or read these files? When you know why you want something“ -- and you really want it -- often your energy and focus come naturally. But sometimes we need a way to fit a new project into a busy schedule. In my experience, one size does not fit everyone. So I've come up with the notion of a Time Management Profile. You need to make time for a special goal: writing a book, researching a new career, marketing your services. What works for you? 1. Swiss Cheese or Chunks Swiss Cheese people find holes in their day - “ ten minutes here, half an hour there. They concentrate easily and actually get something done while waiting for lunch. A Swiss Cheese person says, "I will work on this project for 15 minutes a day -- consistently. And eventually it will get done." Chunk people need a whole afternoon, maybe even a whole day, to get something done. The Chunk person says, "I will devote every Thursday afternoon to marketing." 2. Desktop or Filing Cabinet Desktop people like papers spread all over a desk. They tend to have visual memories so they reach into a pile and find whatever they need. They look cluttered but they are functioning efficiently. Filing Cabinet people demand a clear desk. "A sign of an organized mind," they say, as they slide documents neatly into folders every evening. 3. Weekly Updates or Grand Finale Weekly Update people like systems for accountability. They enjoy calling a coach or friend to report on how much they've done and they will stay focused because they know they will be reporting in. Grand Finale people often become dysfunctional when faced with demands for interim reports. They rebel and stop checking in. "Just give me a deadline," they say. "Stop looking over my shoulder!" So...who's right? Well, everybody, actually. What's important: Understand your style. Don't bother trying to change because you probably won't. Some psychologists believe the brains of Desktop and Filing Cabinet people are actually wired differently. If you're a chunk person with a filing cabinet mind who likes weekly updates, you can keep project notes in a file folder that you explore once a week. But if you are a Swiss Cheese person with a Desktop mind and a Grand Finale motivation style, you will get everything done...at your own pace. I encourage readers to have fun with this one. How can you make your style work for you? Let's say you're a Swiss Cheese with a Desktop Mind. You can set up little piles of projects on your desk. Your "To Do" list might be a set of stickies. If you are a Weekly Updater, you can report on how you moved the piles around. Grand Finale people feel rewarded when they move a sticky from one pile to another...every day. Most important: Don't waste time with an accountability coach if you're a Grand Finale type -- and hire one at once if you are a Weekly Updater. Don't berate yourself over the state of your desk if you are a Desktop person; if the Fire Marshal leaves you alone, you're doing fine. And don't try to master those 15-minute maneuvers if you're a Chunker...or waste a Thursday afternoon fidgeting if you're a Swiss Cheese. RESOURCES: Download Your 21-Day Time Management Makeover. Contact Cathy Goodwin.

Midlife Crisis Career Planning: Your Second Career Game is Not Played in a Straight Line

Recently I sent a message to my ezine list, offering a new low-cost series of group programs. One reader wrote back, "I need a career change, but I'm hesitating to sign up. I've already been to two coaches. One coach said, “Just take action and get motivated.” Another administered tests confirming what I already knew." Sadly, when it comes to careers, everyone’s an expert. My good friend “Brian” (who’s had one career since graduating from college forty-three years ago): “If you’re not happy, you should just talk to your supervisor.” My client "Angela's" spouse: “Just do something – anything! You’ve had plenty of time to decide.” My former neighbor, wagging her finger at me: “What’s the big deal? It’s just a job. Tell your clients they’ll be fine if they just change their attitude.” Reality #1: Career change takes tim -- two to four years. What do you do in the meantime? You choose a perch job or a bridge job. Perch job: Think of birds taking a migration break, bouncing on the high wire. You’re not committed to this job and you probably wouldn’t want to stay forever. But you can stop long enough to pay the bills while you search for your next major move. Bridge job: Your job that gets you closer to a new goal. Maybe you can test your next life. Perch jobs can become bridge jobs and vice versa. Reality #2: Career change is more like a game of “hot and cold” than a straight line. Remember the children’s game: “You’re getting hot...no – you’re moving away – getting colder...” That’s how career change really works, based on published research as well as my own experience. Let’s get real. If your career advisor had a test that could figure out “the perfect career for me,” he wouldn’t be sitting in a stuffy little office discussing your options. He’d be sipping iced drinks on a beach in the Bahamas and taking day trips on the family yacht. Reality #3: Career change is more about action than introspection. You can’t play “hot and cold” unless you’re moving around. Internet searches tend to yield outdated and biased information. Make connections. Talk to people...and then more people. But don’t confuse focused activity with mindless running in circles. When I work one-to-one with clients, we customize plans. On your own, start with professional groups (not service groups like Rotary), your alumni office, and adult ed classes. Reality #4: Sometimes the grass really is greener. Many people get richer and happier after they change careers, businesses and/or residences. Reality #5: Talking to your supervisor (or your colleagues, business associates and customers) is a really, really bad idea. Share your feelings and your vision only with a trusted, confidential source who is completely unconnected to your professional life. Remember “Brian" -- one career for almost forty years? He is a really good friend but we don’t talk about careers. When someone just doesn’t get it, I recommend changing the subject to dogs, cats, basketball, and the magnificent fall weather. Your friendship and your career change will both benefit. Contact Cathy Goodwin. Free Great Careers Ezine -- and download 2 bonuses.

Midlife crisis career planning: How does professional career change really happen?

A few weeks ago, I was chatting with some new acquaintances in my new home town of Seattle, Washington, where we just moved in August. When we talked about my career website, someone asked about career planning. “Frankly,” I said, “the research shows most people choose careers by serendipity. They start doing one thing, and it leads to another, and another...” “No way! I think most choices are planned.” So we went around the room. “Liza” began training for a Second Career in social work. As part of her program, she was required to take classes in drug and alcohol counseling. To her surprise, she found the work fascinating. She went on to take more courses and eventually got certified. Now she works full time in the field. “Tom” decided to take some classes because his wife’s job entitled him to free tuition. Since he was interested in teaching, he took an education course, which turned out to be about program evaluation. He decided he liked statistics. Eventually, he completed a doctorate in educational assessment and now holds an administrative job with a school district. So, someone asked, does this mean an end to career counselor? “Some would say yes,” I said. “But I think the key is becoming aware of opportunities and welcoming serendipitous events. What I mostly do is encourage purposeful planning and action.” And, of course, often an outsider can tell when something’s clicked. What seems to be a detour often turns out to be the main highway...or vice versa. Mainly we’re finding that career changers do not follow the traditional model: identify your strengths, find a perfect match and move to a target like a homing pigeon. Under this model, careers tend to get stalled: we wait to learn about ourselves and often never get past this step.