Whose Business is It, Anyway?

Today's WSJ reports a new trend: Companies are rewarding employees for healthy habits. They discovered some employees started smoking when they realized their fellow employees gained rewards for quitting. Is that dumb or what? Frankly,I wouldn't want my employer involved in my weight, eating habits and exercise. I want a personal life! We're one step away from the company store.

Career Advice from Family? A no-brainer!

<

Today's WSJ (March 27) Cubicle Culture Section - Page B1 if you have the paper version - carries a helpful story: "Our Better Halves Sometimes Expose Our Worst Side." Consultant Jane Genova, according to the story, sought advice for dealing with a difficult client. She turned to her significant other. He suggested she summarize her requirements in a letter. Her clients ridiculed her and the situation got worse. Now, the WSJ says, Ms. Genova hires help. She pays experts with titles like "coach," "therapist," and "consultant." I'm biased. I couldn't agree more. But even I was surprised at the consequences of family advice. Apparently colleagues can recognize the signs: an overnight change of opinion, applications for positions for which the employee is vastly unqualified, and self-destructive decisions. Many years ago, my colleague "Heather" was offered a new position at a more prestigious university. She'd earn a bigger salary with a lower teaching load. Heather's husband, a financial consultant, advised against it. "You won't be happy anywhere," he warned. Heather happened to be seeing a therapist to deal with depression following a personal loss. She mentioned her career to Heather, almost as an afterthought. Heather got lucky. Her therapist was familiar with the academic world. "If you don't take this job," she said, "you may be stuck in your current location for a long time, perhaps forever." Heather took the job and thrived. Family doesn't help. They can do harm, way beyond the cost of hiring a coach or consultant for a few hours. I'm biased, of course. So I was delighted to read this advice in a respected business newspaper.

Job Search Strategy: Do You Fit Their Culture?

Q. I’m looking at a job offer from Mega Company that sounds absolutely perfect for me. A big step up: exciting challenges, salary increase, even a good location. But how do I know I can fit in with the culture? I want to land in a place where I can stay awhile. A. Evaluating culture can be challenging, but it’s absolutely essential. Even the most competent professional can be challenged to perform effectively when she’s labeled a misfit or he’s branded as an outsider. A few tips: (1) How did you feel during the interview? Did you find your stomach clenching? Did all the wrong words come out of your mouth? Or were you relaxed – maybe even sorry to say good-by at the end of the day? (2) How did the office look? Clean desks or clutter? Casual dress or formal? (3) Was your interview smooth? Were you left sitting by yourself when someone was late? To get additional perspective on this challenging topic, I consulted with Dr. Janet Scarborough of Seattle-based www.bridgewaycareer.com. She brought up three additional suggestions: (4) How do your future colleagues behave outside the office setting? “People tend to let down their guard when they leave an organizational setting,” says Dr. Scarborough, “and it is more difficult to sustain a false good impression outside of the artificial interview situation. Especially note how they treat the staff at restaurants.” (5) Can you uncover people who know employees of your future company? Mention the company’s name everywhere you go. You may be surprised to find someone who’s got a friend of a friend at your future company. You may even be able to ask questions like, "What type of boss is Ms. Smith?" “The most reassuring responses are glowing,” says Dr. Scarborough. “Neutral or lukewarm comments are probably negative.” (6) Can you google some of your future colleagues? “So many people have Web sites and blogs these days,” says Dr. Scarborough, “you can find out as much information as most competitive intelligence researchers.” Of course in some conservative industries, you may be dealing with luddites who still live in the Dark Ages. In other fieldsl you’ll find people who share a lot more than they should.

"But they promised..."

For some reason, queries tend to follow patterns. And recently I heard from two people, in two different industries, at opposite ends of the US: "Hi Cathy, "Last year we decided to buy a house. We fell in love with a home that's a 30-minute commute from where I work. I went to my boss. I explained that we were buying a home. He assured me there was no reason to worry about my job. "A few months later I got a horrendous performance review. Now I'm on track to be terminated. If I take another job, I'm facing a 2-hour commute or we will have to sell our dream house. "What went wrong?" Of course I can't read your boss's mind. But I have the following suggestions for anyone who considers buying a home: (1) Make sure you have funds to cover at least 6-12 months of living expenses in case your job is unexpectedly terminated. (2) I advise my clients not to discuss personal affairs with their bosses. The only exception might be maternity leave or legally-mandated family leave, and then you go through HR and dot all the i's. You'll never know what feelings your announcement will create among your bosses and colleagues. Maybe she's thinking, "They're buying a house in Gardenville? Hmm...I can't afford to live there. Must have a rich spouse." Or maybe he just notices you more. Now he's thinking, "I notice Lilianne seems to miss meetings a lot." Or, "Manuel needs to improve his writing skills." Or she thinks, "Why is Helene so concerned about her job? Maybe she's covering..." Of course your boss might be genuinely happy for you. But most of us can't control our subconscious, not-so-nice feelings. We're not even aware of them. (3) Want some assurance of job security? Talk to a lawyer first. Find out if your boss's email to you ("Nothing to worry about! Congrats on the new home!") has any legal standing. I am not a lawyer. I am not giving legal advice. But my experience says you can't take those assurances to the bank, let alone the courtroom. If you're a lawyer reading this post, please add a comment. Verbal assurance? Forget it. Unless your boss makes a big announcement on tape, or you've got credible witnesses unconnected with the company, it's your word against his. A contract? Now you've got a new ball game...and the lawyers are the ones who pass the ball around. Finally, apart from the job, think marketability. When you move to a location where you'll have trouble basing a new job search, you're losing marketability. Believe me, I've been there! If your current employer is the only game in town -- and maybe in a 25-mile radius -- you're taking a risk. Nothing wrong with risks. But when you go out on a stormy sea in a leaky boat, you'll wear a life preserver. You won't wait till you get out on the ocean to decide if you need to pack one or not. My readers are smart. You get the drift. Check out my website for more.

Performance review: don't delay taking action

Recently I've had a few queries that were remarkably similar to one another. They went like this: "Hi Cathy. Six months ago I had a bad performance review. Now I am on a performance improvement plan. Attached is the letter from HR. Can you help?" I positively hate these messages because by this time, there's not much we can do. I encourage everyone to hire a lawyer to negotiate settlements, references and anything that will make the transition easier. Often employers have already seen the writing on the wall. In fact, it's in their own handwriting. They may make concessions if you are willing to resign immediately. For example: 90 days on the payroll with no responsibilities (when you might be on a 60-day warning period) extra severance if you've been employed a long time outplacement or independent career consulting services They'll probably also agree to offer a noncomittal reference if anyone calls. When I work one-to-one with clients we discuss ways to address the reference question. I think of other emails and phone calls that begin, "Hi Cathy. I just got a bad performance review. It's a first for me! How do I respond? What do I do?" Now I can probably help. You have time to search for a new job, mend fences, and do all sorts of things to preserve your finances and well-being. Each situation is diffferent. I recommend the Power Hour - my 60-minute consultation. Some people recognize the value. But often I never hear from these callers again. Somehow they feel I should advise them for free. I often wonder how many of them end up with the 60-day notice, performance plan or worse. I wish I could warn them: A small investment in the early stages will save a lot of pain later. Meanwhile,check out my ebook.

The Apprentice Los Angeles: they really ARE in tents

Ouch! Was I ever wrong. I couldn't believe The Donald would really allow smart professionals to camp out in a tent, with inadequate bathroom facilities, to say the least. It seems there really is a tent. Some of the contestants have been looking downright scruffy. Interviewed after the show, one woman said, "Of course we looked awful! I hadn't washed my hair in days." The tent experience was created to make some good television. In theory those in the tents will be more motivated to work hard and get back into the mansion. In reality these kinds of motivations often backfire. You're tired and dirty. You realize some outcomes are almost random. Winning a task sometimes comes down to a single extra sale or a fortuitous location. The show makes a difference: where are the cameras focused? But I see another concern. Job interviews are supposed to be two-way. Applicants are not supplicants. They're people with dignity. If you're good, your employer needs you and you are having a business conversation about what you can contribute. I'm lucky. I left corporate America before the widespread use of background checks, lie detectors, drug tests and stress interviews. Never had any. I was background-checked for my current apartment and declined a telecommute job that required one. Even in this environment, you have to decide what you'll accept in order to get a particular job. Sure, if you decline a drug test or refuse to give information for a background check, your employer assumes you have something to hide. As far as I'm concerned, that's their problem. Trump candidates have been through background checks, psychological tests, physical exams and a whole lot more. And now they're sleeping in a tent if they lose. Maybe The Apprentice is like Mount Everest. It's there. It's a challenge. So go do it. Apart from the tent, Trump insults the candidates. He refers to their "ass" and their "stinking tent" and sneers on camera. To be sure, he bestows compliments: he admired the golf game of four women who golfed with him after winning a task. But he's still more than a little patronizing. Why put up with it? That's the question I hope more viewers are asking.

Softer Side of Networking

Last week we talked about attending networking events. This week I’m answering a frequently asked question: Q. “I’ve read about interviewing for information. But after working for many years, I don’t feel comfortable calling up strangers to ask for help.” A. I would agree with you. The first edition of What Color Is Your Parachute rolled out over 30 years ago. Millions of people discovered a revolutionary technique known as Interviewing for information. Ever since, we’ve been getting guidance like, “People are bored in their jobs. They feel flattered when someone calls to ask for information. They’re happy to take fifteen minutes to help.” Alas, these days people may be bored, but they’re also busy. More and more, you need a referral to get past the gatekeepers. So I recommend starting with soft networking. Meet strangers in a friendly, low-key setting and you’ll benefit from the principle of Six Degrees of Separation. (1) Alumni groups. If you attended college (even if you didn’t graduate), your alumni office most likely will share a directory. Even Scrooge-y types like me will return calls from fellow alums who ask about life in Seattle or New Mexico. Don’t forget high school, graduate school and professional groups. (2) Lunch and dinner meetings. Many associations host meetings where you can make low-key contacts. Just in the past few months, I’ve attended functions with a business owner group and an MBA alumni group where visitors openly asked for career change help. It’s hard to predict where you’ll find success. I recently connected a job seeker with someone in a field where I have no experience, just based on a casual conversation with a neighbor who just found a great job in that field. (3) Social groups and friends. Connections get made at dog parks, parties, personal interest groups, cooking classes, and more. As you use these sources: Keep conversation casual and low-key. Just say, “I’m looking for information about job opportunities in Albuquerque” or, “I’ve been looking for a position in project management.” And wait. Ask for information, not advice. Avoid selling yourself, but it’s okay to end with a request for referrals. When calling business owners who sell their time, respect the boundaries. More than 15 minutes? You need a paid consultation. Take a few minutes to send a follow-up and a thank you email. “Thanks for referring me to Ken. We have a meeting set up for next week.”(Of course Ken gets a thank you note too, but you already knew that, right?) End the suspense. Send an outcome report to everyone who helped. “After talking to six people, I decided to accept a job with… Thanks again for referring me to Ken. He was very helpful.”

The Secret: Not a secret anymore...

I watched The Secret twice: first online (with several interruptions) following a recommendation by a marketing coach, then at a conference (where I fell asleep halfway through). My feelings about the Law of Attraction: I believe if you can crystallize a goal, your subconscious mind goes to work and you get drawn to new ways to achieve your goal. Many of my clients spend lots of consulting time discussing what's wrong with their careers (and sometimes their lives, but that's way beyond my scope). We make progress when we turn to projecting the future. Christina Merkley (www.shift-it-coaching.com) has a good combination of attraction marketing and common sense. When I talked to her, she agreed we could translate some concepts into down-to-earth terms. For instance, "vibrating" really is about "mood." And lots of research shows that mood influences all sorts of outcomes. Doctors who are in a good mood will approach clinical decision-making differently, according to research by Professor Alice Isen (of Cornell University last time I checked). But other research shows that defensive pessimism -- expecting the worst -- can be productive for many people. I've talked to clients who jumped in to new cities and houses with great optimism but with no Plan B. They counted on the income from a job to make the mortgage payments. Or they counted on keeping a job within easy commuting distance of their dream homes. Sometimes they can find ways to hold on to what they love. We can talk about starting businesses, e-businesses, telecommuting and more. These options work well for some clients. Jumping in with both feet is just fine, if you do research. Recently I saw an article about holding back from a goal of becoming a teacher for fear of "living on a teacher's salary." There's no easy answer. Some people feel liberated in their new world, so they stretch their new incomes to meet their needs, happily. Others feel like they've inadvertently entered a prison of their own making. They resent the lower income so much they can't enjoy the career. And some find the dream career has hidden traps they never expected. Being a teacher means you get to work with children...but you also can't leave your classroom to make a quick phone call. One third grade teacher told me she's evaluated on her bulletin boards as much as her teaching. And don't get me started on standardized tests. Got a dream? My rule of thumb is, "Jump into the research. Learn everything you can. But move slowly on commitment."

Networking Tips From a Networking Event

When I first moved to Seattle, I was determined to get involved in networking. After four years in a small town in New Mexico, suddenly I had opportunities to meet prospects face to face. I loved meeting new people. And connections began to happen. But at first I couldn’t help wondering, “Will all this activity be productive?” Then last week I heard a talk by Zita Gustin. She gave us an exercise that you can try in your own group. First we shared with a fellow participant the answers to four work related questions. Then we answered a more fun set of questions. Where are you from? What television programs do you watch? What’s a good business book you’ve read lately? As Zita pointed out, we were all far more animated in the second exercise. It was fun and we discovered points of connection we never anticipated. Okay, you might have suspected some of mine: “I’m from Snohomish.” ”That’s where my dog is from! Her first owners found her in the SPCA up there.” Networking is an investment of time (and of course money and energy). Most people attend a meeting or two and then give up, saying, “Nothing happened.” But after weeks, months and years, and sometimes volunteering for committees, you begin to reap the real rewards. Over time, I’ve been greeted warmly in groups where I first felt unwelcome and out of place. Psychologist Stanley Milgram (known for his infamous obedience experiments) studied the way familiarity leads to liking. When you see the same people over and over – even when you wait at the same bus stop --- you develop positive feelings for them. Of course, I believe some networking events and professional groups are more valuable than others. Some groups have invisible barriers that keep new members at a distance. In a few dog-eat-dog fields, networking won’t be productive. In some locations, you won’t have opportunities to network productively. When I work with clients, we discuss targeted networking strategies that will most likely lead to success. But generally, if you’re ready to make a change, go hang around with some people who are doing what you would like to do. Just have fun with them and stop if you don’t. And often the best connections get made in the most unlikely places…even just because, “We both have dogs.”

Stuck in dead-end job...

Watching Barbara Ehrenreich (author of Bait and Switch) on BookTV - a 3-hour indepth perspective. One caller said, "I'm stuck in a dead-end job, although I have a college degree. I just got divorced and needed a job after not working for many years." Ehrenreich referred her to unitedprofessionals.org. Here's another idea. If you're at the lowest rung of the organizational ladder, choose an organization with upward mobility. Hotels, airlines and other organizations tend to promote from within. I met a hotel General Manager who says he began working as a bus boy in a hotel dining room. Do some research. Kinko's associates do surprisingly well with profit-sharing. It happens. I met a woman in Florida who rose from secretary to VP of three different organizations, starting over each time. If your organization doesn't promote from within, or it's too small to offer upward mobility, you need a new employer.

Networking: You never know...

Last night I met a young woman who needs a new job. On the surface, I seemed to have no experience or contacts. But as it happens, my neighbor found a postition in her field, following an intensive job search. The next day I got permission to give my neighbor's contact info to the young woman. Who knows what will happen? The point is, connections wiill surprise you. Get the word out, everywhere!