Career Advice from Family? A no-brainer!

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Today's WSJ (March 27) Cubicle Culture Section - Page B1 if you have the paper version - carries a helpful story: "Our Better Halves Sometimes Expose Our Worst Side." Consultant Jane Genova, according to the story, sought advice for dealing with a difficult client. She turned to her significant other. He suggested she summarize her requirements in a letter. Her clients ridiculed her and the situation got worse. Now, the WSJ says, Ms. Genova hires help. She pays experts with titles like "coach," "therapist," and "consultant." I'm biased. I couldn't agree more. But even I was surprised at the consequences of family advice. Apparently colleagues can recognize the signs: an overnight change of opinion, applications for positions for which the employee is vastly unqualified, and self-destructive decisions. Many years ago, my colleague "Heather" was offered a new position at a more prestigious university. She'd earn a bigger salary with a lower teaching load. Heather's husband, a financial consultant, advised against it. "You won't be happy anywhere," he warned. Heather happened to be seeing a therapist to deal with depression following a personal loss. She mentioned her career to Heather, almost as an afterthought. Heather got lucky. Her therapist was familiar with the academic world. "If you don't take this job," she said, "you may be stuck in your current location for a long time, perhaps forever." Heather took the job and thrived. Family doesn't help. They can do harm, way beyond the cost of hiring a coach or consultant for a few hours. I'm biased, of course. So I was delighted to read this advice in a respected business newspaper.