"That job will always be there..."

You wouldn't believe how often we leave a field where we have a strong position, thinking, "I can always go back." Or, "They'll always make a place for me." Or, "I have unique skills and talents! Of course I can go back." So we leap off the dock and land in the ocean...way over our heads. And then we look for a life raft. What happened to that job? Well, the career field has changed. Or the boss who promised us, "You'll always have a home here" has retired. Or we've changed. We no longer fit in. Bottom Line: It's easier to hang on, even if the job is miserable, than to try to climb back aboard. Once you've been swimming around the ocean, your fingers get stiff. And then it's much tougher to hold on.

Moving from Small Town to Big City...

After four years in a small town, moving to a Big City sometimes feels like traveling to another planet. I'd advise anyone contemplating a similar move to (a) toss out every piece of clothing you own, because fashions change more than you'd imagine; (b) hold off on signing up for anything till you've been there at least a year; (c) plan to revise the way you think about your business; (d) avoid attending any networking meetings till you've found a good hairdresser and bought at least 2 new outfits; (e) don't expect to enjoy the same books, tapes, television shows and leisure activities you did. Everything changes.

Do we know each other?

These days we make ephemeral connections through the Internet. Someone takes a class from me (or with me). Someone googles my name and wants to get in touch...after five or ten or twenty years. So I get a mysterious email like the one I got today. "Mary Jones announces she has started a blog." Who on earth is Mary Jones? No clue: she sent her announcement to a bcc list so I can't place her in context. Well, she's probably a terrific person, but I'll never know. The links to her new blog don't work either.

Was that interview for real?

Q. "I'm still dizzy from my latest encounter. Aargh. I went on an interview that should have been a slam-dunk...and nothing happened. I felt like they were putting on a show." A. You are absolutely right: many interviews are just for show. And you are absolutely wise (in my opinion, anyway) to consider alternatives like solo-preneurship. And although companies say they're searching for the right candidate, sometimes they already hired someone -- and they are jumping through hoops for the HR department. It can have an upside. I once had a delightful trip to Boston as the "other candidate." I asked if I could stay over an extra couple of nights at my own expense. No problem, they said - we'll pick up on tab. A guilt trip? I sure hope so! Note: This article is based in part on my Job Search Book: Click here to learn more.

Unsolicited advice: Not from their intuition

Some time ago I fell into conversation with "Gretchen," another business consultant at a networking event. It was late. I'd had a glass of wine and was feeling relaxed...too relaxed! So I shared some of the challenges I was facing with my own business. Should I change the name. Should I attend a specific event. Aargh. And then I went home, got busy with the dog and a couple of new clients, and forgot the conversation. A few days later I was pleased to open my email and see a message from Gretchen. How nice, I thought. She's following up with a nice "glad to meet you note." Instead, Gretchen treated me to a long, long list of suggestions for my business. I appreciated her concern for me, but I couldn't help wondering. If she's busy and successful, why would she spend the time writing me an email? I'm a fast writer. It would have taken me at least an hour. And I don't give away my time. And if she knows her business, she should remember the cardinal rule of consulting (and coaching, for that matter). Information first. Recommendations second. Finally. Gretchen is not a business consultant or a marketing consultant. Even if I like her ideas, wouldn't I want to check them out? If I asked Gretchen, she'd probably say, "My intuition for you is..." But I would respond, "That's pseudo-intuition. Real intuition does not lead to unsolicited advice. Ever." Bottom Line: I'm going to remind my own clients to beware of unsolicited advice, getting or giving. Typically you just get paid in frustration. Note: This article is based in part on my Special Report on Intuition: Click here to learn more.

Midlife Career Change Can Be A Crisis

Looking for a reality check? Check out the Wall Street Journal's online Career Forums. There's one thread about midlife career -- with over 400 posts, the biggest of all. And some of the most frustrating. I wish I could tell everyone, "Stop pounding on closed doors. At some point, it's easier to go solo." And don't wait too long: right after you lose your job, go into multi-tasking mode. Spend part of each day networking and answering ads for your next job. And then stop and start planning for a new self-employed career. Hire coaches and consultants while you can still afford them. See my article on mentors

Beware the city stereotypes

An experienced marketer said, "You're living in Seattle! You have access to all sorts of networking events!" True. But many are in Bellevue - an inconvenient hour (and lightyears in mindset) away from me. Every city has hidden quirks. Some offer respect only to residents who lasted three winters or five years. Some still socialize with their old high school classmates and you won't break in easily. I once met a family who moved to Philadelphia because their daughter got accepted at the prestigious Curtis Institute of Music. With substantial experience in specialty retail, the father anticipated no problem in getting a job. But in fact only two stores appeared -- and both were fully staffed. Research first to avoid disappointment afterward. For more see my Report on Moving.

[Your career strategy] Good article here

It's rare to find accurate articles in the Real World, but I really liked this one about top career myths: http://tinyurl.com/fu8wo I especially agree with the author's points about negotiating: anyone can negotiate. And I also emphasize that compensation issues often have to arise before you get to the very end of the process. You need to find out if you're both wasting time. I can't resist pointing out my own downloadable Irreverent Job Search Guide, which makes many similar points: Click here.

Career Change can challenge achievers more than non-achievers

Today's Seattle Times carried an article, Financial scams can fool even the money-wise. Click here to read the article. Why am I not surprised? Because I've learned that career achievers often experience the greatest difficulty in making career change. I've said it's because the rules are different. Readers will remember me saying (over and over again), "Career success is like NFL football. Career change is like playground basketball." But there are similarities to the financial vulnerability described in this article. Achievers are used to making their own decisions. They're confident: "I've been successful in the past and I can succeed again." They also tend to be overly optimistic, believing in straightforward solutions. And that's why they're vulnerable to pitches from overenthusiastic coaches and outright scams, like the resume-blasting services. (OK, they do send resumes around, but they usually do more harm than good.) And those vulnerable to scams tend to have more challenges in their lives, such as illness. What the article doesn't say is that intuition can be silent during a crisis or a transition. That's because intuition feeds on knowledge. And in a transition, we're in a betwixt and between state of knowing nothing. I discuss this topic extensively in my Special Report on Intuition. I've been there too. I've hired some of the worst coaches and consultants on the planet, at least for me. With my own clients, I try to be as realistic as possible. But of course, being solid achievers, most of us opt for optimism, to our own peril.

[Your Career Strategy] Discretion at work

A reader asks, “We spent so many hours in the workplace. We begin to believe our coworkers are our friends. How can we be open and friendly yet protect ourselves?” Good question. As my long-time readers know, I encourage everyone to err on the side of discretion. I’ve met few people who said, “I wish I’d shared more.” I’ve met many who say, “I wish I had said nothing.” (1) Assume everyone’s connected. In a new job or a new city, it’s easy to share our fears, worries and first impressions. But your next door neighbor may have hidden ties to your boss (or your landlord). Your coworker may be newly divorced from the newly hired management consultant. It happens. (2) Come across as positive. This one can be difficult. As a newcomer, you’ll inevitably find much to criticize in your new world. But everyone’s looking to you as the new ray of sunshine. Let them down at your peril. (3) Expect players to change roles. Your best confidante can become your new boss, new subordinate or fiercest competitor. A coworker can become a source of business referrals. When roles move the other way, from friendship to business, we usually lose the friendship and end up leaving the business. (4) Choose the language of discretion. Some of my favorite people like to use what we might call colorful language – the type of talk you’d hear on The Sopranos or SATC in HBO-land. But if I met them in a business setting, for the very first time, I’d be the opposite of impressed. And I recommend avoiding even a hint of prejudice or stereotyping. Ever. Even when joking. (5) Welcome to the Real World. Over twenty years ago, Mary Tyler Moore threw her perky winter hat into the air to open her television show. Since then many viewers wished for a cozy work setting that was one big family, like theirs. We forget the family was often dysfunctional. We forget the setting was a rundown company that was going nowhere. Anyway, Mary’s real life counterpart couldn’t afford the clothes. You may be one of the lucky few who felt very close to a boss or coworker, a few jobs ago, or maybe now. It happens. But most of the time, you’re always on-stage in your own real life drama. Rather than seek closeness with coworkers, I’ve found that successful achievers usually build a personal circle of confidantes, coaches, consultants, friends and family. They get strength off the job so they can appear strong on the job, even when they feel scared, weak and frustrated. I’m sure some of you will disagree with me. Share your ideas by replying to this ezine, leaving the subject line as is. Some good reading by other authors: http://www.cathygoodwin.com/topcareerbooks.html

[Career change] "Reeling from Rumor"

It happened fast. Fans of Seattle Storm WNBA basketball were heading into the gym for a noontime game when they began to hear the whispers: “Storm and Sonics are moving to Oklahoma.” Some listened to car radios on their way to the game. Others picked up the word from street vendors. Everyone was in shock and you might as well have hung black banners from the rafters. Although newspapers reported the team hadn’t been told, the Storm played a miserable game. So what if you hear rumors that affect your career or your business? (1) Differentiate rumors and gossip. Gossip tends to be presented as fact about people. Rumors tend to be speculations about forthcoming events, according to Ralph Resnow, a former Temple psychology professor. I would add, “Rumors tend to raise questions like, ‘What should we do?’” We feel we need to take action, now or in the present. (2) Assess the impact on your future if the rumor turns out to be true. Let’s face it: I would sorely miss the Storm if they moved across the bridge to Bellevue, let alone to Oklahoma. I probably wouldn’t leave Seattle or change much of my life. But if you hear a rumor about layoffs and mergers, you may realize you could experience very serious consequences. (3) Create a plan for your worst case scenario. For basketball, my worst case scenario means finding a new entertainment (okay, fanaticism) for many summer evenings beginning 2008. For some of my clients, a worst case scenario might mean looking for a new job. Some might consider starting a business. (4) Identify actions to prepare for your worst case scenario. Recently a client emailed to set up a consultation to get his resume revised. He had just heard rumors of a merger affecting his company sometime in the coming fall. “I will probably be safe,” he said, “but I want to be prepared.” “In my experience,” I said, “those who plan ahead tend to be spared the worst impact of a business crisis. No magic: they present a strong image and they think clearly.” Beyond preparing a resume, you have to weigh the consequences of other actions, such as communicating with a recruiter. (5) Present an appearance of calm confidence. I encourage clients to avoid sharing fears and anxieties with others in the workplace, including their own customers. Hire professional resources to deal with feelings and/or make plans for your next career. And finally, during a time of anxiety, everyone will seem like an expert. We’re all tempted to turn to friends, family, neighbors, dog-walkers and even strangers, hoping for facts that will put our worst fears to rest. Chances are, they know less than they claim. I must admit I called a good friend on the East Coast who is a lifelong sports fan. “They’ll never go to Oklahoma,” he said confidently. “No audience! Who watches basketball in Oklahoma?” The next day, I learned that a New Orleans NBA team had temporarily relocated to Oklahoma City following Katrina. Local residents eagerly bought season tickets, raising attendance to sixth in the league. I’m no longer reassured. But I’m motivated to learn a lot more about rumors and continue to work with clients who deal –and reel -- with them.

[Career change tips] "Diversify and keep your power"

Recently a client said, "I've identified two companies that I'd really, really like to work for. Should I concentrate all my efforts on those companies or keep other avenues open?" Here's what I'd say. Sometimes a laser focus pays off. I once met "Ruth," who was absolutely determined to get a career in hotel sales. She began attending industry meetings, building relationships with key hotel managers and taking classes in hospitality management. After awhile she began to look as though she belonged. And eventually she did land an offer. Ruth invested several months in her search. Thanks to unemployment and severance, she could take time off to mount a dedicated campaign. Most of my clients can't. If Ruth had been my client, I would have suggested moving in more than one direction. After all, suppose she reaches her Paradise and finds a half dozen alligators hiding in the swamp (which she thought was a lake, actually)? And by keeping multiple irons in the fire, she would come across as confident and strong rather than needy and desperate. Targeting a single comany is even more hazardous than choosing a single industry. Keep a Plan B going and diversify your portfolio of opportunities.

[Great career moves] Taking a personal day?

The New York Times's "Career Couch" section posed the question, "Should you lie to your employer if if you're taking a day off for fun in the sun? Not surprisingly, everyone they asked said, "Don't do it!" Well, if you're going to be quoted in a national newspaper, would you advise readers to lie? Think of the liability, if nothing else. Frankly, I think we need to question why we measure our value in hours, days, months and years. You do your work, whenever and wherever you want. When you're done, you stop. Period. Sometimes you do need face time. But a lot of requirements seem based on ego, not necessity. So what would I say to a client? I say, "I'm not going to tell you whether to lie about anything. That's up to you. But if you're going to embark on a career change, you'll need time to go on interviews and attend meetings. You'll even need time to talk to me! If you can't carve out this time, you'll face a challenge." Typically, my clients tend to be on a sufficiently high level, so they don't need to take a day off. THey have leeway in scheduling. But I'm always surprised how much surveillance takes place, even at the highest levels. A personal day? Everyone I know has taken a mental health day at some time or other. You have to know your own organization's culture about personal days, lying, and generally being uptight versus reasonable. Some organizations expect you to lie. Others view even a small fib as a firing offense. Life is short. Do what you have to do. And set a goal of working somewhere sane, so you don't have to sneak out on a magnificent Friday afternoon.

[Career information] Can I Afford to Move Here?

Q. I live in a wonderful house in the Midwest. Recently a recruiter asked if I’d consider a new job with a move to Southern California. The salary would be higher but the cost of living – ouch! Should I go on the interview? A. Let’s do the easy part first. I almost always recommend going on the interview. Of course, don’t jeopardize your current job or current clients. But you have little to lose. Occasionally you will be considered for other jobs in the company. You may be able to negotiate a telecommute option. Your interviewer may know of other opportunities in more desirable locations. And now let’s say you get a job offer for Los Angeles. You wonder if you can find a place to rent or buy. The only affordable homes seem to be 2 hours away from your job. What can you do? We’re focusing here on finding a place to live, but the process works for other must-haves, too: access to the ocean, driving versus public transportation, art museums...even a good bakery or deli. (a) Visit your new city before you accept an offer. Don’t skip this step, even if you pay your own way. (b) Look around on your own – not with an agent or company representative. (If an agent offers to show you around, take another day alone.) As you look, make detailed notes. Stay in touch with an objective friend, family member or paid consultant – someone who can be a sounding board when you’re facing a tough decision. (c) Revisit your offer. Don’t be surprised if the dollar amount and the terms look different – in either direction -- after your “Explorer Day.” Consider negotiating for a signing bonus or additional salary. Or make your acceptance contingent on finding a place to live. (d) Be ready to walk away from an offer. We tell ourselves, “Sure, I can handle a two-hour commute.” Or “I can downsize to a 500-square-foot studio apartment for me, my St. Bernard dog, and my three cats. And if the guy in my life becomes my life partner, we’ll squeeze him in too.” My friend “Tim” is like that. He’s super-easygoing and he can live in anything from a dungeon to a palace. Most of us can’t. (e) Be ruthlessly honest. Resentment leads to frustration, anger and stress. This is not the time to grit your teeth and mutter, “I can do this!” or, “I can do without that!” (unless, of course, you’re trying to survive the Marine Corps Boot Camp – a career choice that draws my admiration but not my expertise). When I was in graduate school, one of my classmates had been a successful corporate manager. When he decided to go back to school, he sold a large house and downsized to a tiny dark studio apartment, determined to live the student life. He dropped out of school in the middle of his very first year, although he had been identified as a promising scholar. I am convinced he’d have completed the program if he had chosen a nicer place to live. Bottom Line: Every time I (or my clients) have said “No” to an offer for honest, realistic reasons, a better opportunity seems to turn up, faster than expected. No guarantees but don’t be surprised if that’s your experience too. Considering your own relocation? Don’t move without my ebook. Manage your money during a life transition. Download here. And if you’re struggling with a decision like this one, teach your intuition to send a telegram – not a post card. Download here.

[Great Career Information] Myth of Midlife Crisis Career Change

Recently the Wall Street Journal carried a story about a 49-year-old public relations specialist, laid off four years ago, currently working as a seasonal post office employee. “Could he hope to be back on a payroll?” the article asked. Here’s what I’d advise if he called me. (1) Gain momentum early. When you first suspect your job is going away, begin taking steps to your new career. If you’re not sure what to do, invest in a coach or consultant before you need one. (2) Discover the difference between career change and career success. Long time readers will recognize this idea. Corporate success is like pro football: you’re rewarded for following someone else’s game plan and being in the right place at the right time. Career change is like playground basketball: be ready to scramble. (3) Avoid a functional resume. Midlife professionals often wonder if they should leave off dates and focus on skills. Alas, HR managers realize what you’re doing. Everyone’s reading the same career advice. Employers have become suspicious of functional resumes, suspecting you have something to hide. (That’s why they used functional resumes in their job search.) I’ve seen people hit a wall with functional resumes, then hit a home run with a well-designed chronological resume. (4) Use a backdoor strategy to search. You may find a job on the Internet, but more likely you’ll connect with someone who knows someone who ... I don’t recommend, “interviewing for information” when you’re a seasoned pro. Instead, find creative ways to develop contacts that build on your experience. Ideally, your resume (and your age) will be viewed as irrelevant. (5) Consider self-employment. I would never encourage a client to stop searching for a “real” job with a paycheck and benefits. But sometimes you’ll earn more income -- faster -- by hiring yourself. The WSJ article describes a retired PR person who earns fourteen dollars an hour as a relief mail carrier. Scary. But not necessary. Most likely he could come up with half a dozen ways to sell his skills for a much higher hourly rate. Some of my clients have been surprised at how well they performed as solo-preneurs. But they were even more surprised to realize they were becoming more marketable as job candidates. Who would a hiring manager choose: Mark, a desperate soul who’s been pounding the pavement in between minimum-wage jobs? Or Mary, a confident businessperson who’s demonstrating that she can attract paying customers? Jobs are like bank loans. They’re most likely to arrive when you don’t absolutely have to have them. Ready to turn your lazy, good-for-nothing website into a powerhouse profit center that works 24/7? Visit the Copy Cat. Download your valuable 10-page fr*e Report: 7 Best-Kept Secrets of Client Attracting Websites. Click here.

[Career advice] Your Career's Midlife Crisis: Are You a Jumper or a Clinger?

Over the years, I have identified two kinds of midlife career changers: Jumpers and Clingers. Jumpers thrive on energy, enthusiasm and improbable luck. The last three times they leaped, a net appeared. They see no reason why the next jump should be any different. Clingers thrive on careers that offer security, money and identity. When they outgrow their careers, or find themselves forced out, they feel lost. They can't remember the last time they found themselves in this position. Coaching jumpers and clingers for career change Jumpers call a coach when they are ready to find a new mountain. Suggest a destination and they ask, "Where is it?" Often they've made another leap before the coach realizes what is going on. Clingers call a coach when they find themselves lost in the jungle. They ask, "How do I know if I've made the right decision?" and, "How can I find security?" They hold out a one-way ticket, asking, "How do I change to a round trip?" Jumpers have learned to accept that sinking-feeling-in-the-gut as they leap off the mountain. Climbers are not used to feeling edgy. They don't want a roadmap; they want a hotel reservation, preferably chosen from a listing in the auto club directory. Career change lessons for jumpers and clingers Both Jumpers and Clingers face a new reality. Even the bravest Jumper can run out of luck. Choose the wrong mountain and the net never appears. And in the twenty- first century, Clingers must create their own security. Jumpers must stop at the edge of the mountain, before the point of no return. "Does this feel right?" they have to ask. "Should I look first this time, to see if the net really exists? Or maybe instead of leaping it's time to climb down more carefully, one ledge at a time." Clingers also have to ask, "Does this feel right?" Like Jumpers, they must look for safety nets. They learn to read maps and differentiate between dangerous potholes and afternoon shadows. And when they can't get a guaranteed hotel reservation, they learn to make a contingency plan to avoid sleeping in the park. Jumpers learn to walk where they used to run. Clingers learn to walk where they used to ride. Most people will combine the qualities of jumpers and clingers, but you can save a lot of grief by knowing your prevailing style. Jumpers need guides who say, "Stop! Think!" Clingers need guides who motivate them to go. Over-motivated jumpers become daredevils; over-planned clingers lose momentum. Disasters and Victories Both jumpers and clingers can head for disaster. Jumpers leap into icy water or treacherous rocks. Clingers find their once-secure shelter has been blown over by a hurricane. Jumpers bring energy and daring to a new venture; clingers bring planning skills and a track record of past accomplishment. Ultimately, both achieve success by recognizing their own operational styles and using their own strengths to survive and thrive in new terrain. Career Consultant Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D. created the 21-Day Extreme Career Makeover guide for midlife professionals who want to transform career breakdowns to career breakthroughs. Download here. Download your fr*e Report: Why Most Career Change Fails (and how to write your own success story) Sign up here.

[Great Career Information] "Reached goal...feeling miserable"

“Cynthia” just passed the bar exam, after trying unsuccessfully a year ago. To everyone’s surprise, she’s not glowing with joy. Instead, she’s feeling a big letdown. “Ivan” just landed a new job, after searching for months. “Karen” just sold her business for a 7-figure sum – enough so she may never have to work again. She’s feeling lost and dazed. What’s going on? Any transition involves loss – even when you’re experiencing positive change. So it’s not surprising when you experience re-entry shock. Here are three steps to take before you reach the finish line. Once you’re there, you won’t feel like planning. And in my experience, anticipating a reward can be a great motivator. 1. Plan a big event to celebrate. Transitions are best marked by ritual. Society has few rituals to celebrate getting promoted or landing a dream job after a long campaign. So we have to create our own. Plan a big party and invite everyone you know. Get a cake. Serve champagne (if it’s part of your value system) and get someone else to drive you home. 2. Plan activities you will enjoy. When you’ve worked toward a goal for a long time, your days were filled with purposeful activity and (probably) interesting people. Cynthia, for instance, spent long hours with her study group. Karen worked 11-hour days with frequent calls to her business advisors. Suddenly your days can seem bleak in comparison. Cynthia faces a daunting round of job interviews. Ivan has to experience a learning curve before he can dig in and begin to enjoy the job he wanted. Best to begin your new life with a busy calendar. If your career days seem mundane, search elsewhere: art classes, camping, volunteer work and family time. Develop a project, in or out of your career. 3. Plan your next big win. What will your next big meaningful goal look like? Karen wanted a new career in the arts. Ivan wanted to start his own business. Cynthia wasn’t sure – which is fine. A law degree can take her in many exciting directions. But she can begin by exploring options now, years before she needs them. My own experience happened more by luck than design. As I completed my PhD dissertation, I knew I would miss my classmates and friends in the Bay Area. In fact, I would miss everything about the Bay Area. So I planned a six-week overseas trip, beginning right after graduation. My friends organized a great party and someone even made a healthy California cake. (Well, it had fruit on top.) Luckily, I had a job waiting. I’d started a research project, with a new goal of becoming marketable. It worked. And I’ve repeated the pattern more than once, just filling in the blanks a little differently.

[Time Management] Conquering a Mountain of Messages

Q. I just moved into a management position and have more email than ever. Right now 200 items are waiting in my inbox, unread, because I don't have time to give them the attention they deserve. If I stop and read, I lose the rhythm of my "real" work. A. One skill we didn't teach in business school was, "Know when to knock yourself out and when to do the bare minimum to get by." For example, "Leo" worked for a management team that demanded one report after another. While his colleagues toiled weekends, Leo tossed the requests. Most of the time nobody noticed. As a new manager, you're probably not ready to follow Leo's style. Some consultants would advise you to "accidentally" trash every single one of those emails and wait to see who follows up. I would encourage you to consult your sense of job security, ethics and intuition before taking such a drastic step. But you can begin to conquer the mountain and conserve your energy. Some specific tips: 1. Evaluate your own skills. Are you a fast reader and writer? If not, can you enhance your speed with practice and training? 2. Group your emails by sender and subject. Are a few people sending all the emails? Do they seem to repeat themselves? Can you design processes to handle repetitive requests automatically? 3. Read each email once and make a fast disposition. Don't wade through paragraphs of dense prose. Head right for the bottom line. Chances are you already know the question or you realize you don't need to respond. 4. Find out what's happening to the folks who sent all those messages. Has their work come to a grinding halt? Are they holding up production lines, waiting for your answer? If not, chances are you may never have to respond. They probably forgot what they sent you in the first place. 5. Train your subordinates and (if possible) peers. When you get a long-winded, dense email, return it with a request for rewrite. Encourage everyone to combine several messages into one. Mostly, though, I would question why you think these messages "deserve" attention. How will your own boss judge your performance? Your company's bottom line deserves your best efforts and your own career deserves your best ability to set priorities. In our personal lives, we can devote attention to anyone we want. We can prioritize time for family, friends and dogs. But in business, you owe attention only to bosses, customers and those who require answers in order to do their best work. And you owe them just enough attention to get the job done effectively and courteously. This article is based on Cathy Goodwin's ebook, Your 21 Day Time Management Makeover. Click here to download and discover Cathy's practical (and highly irreverent) tips for making more time in your life. Click here for a complete list of Cathy's ebooks.

[Great Career Tips] Serious Career Advice from a Light-Hearted Reality TV Show

The Bachelor - a popular reality TV show - offers an example of how we absolutely, positively should not make career decisons. Premise: A very eligible Bachelor (such as a handsome young doctor or NFL quarterback) stays in a mansion with several eligible young women. They seem to spend their days swimming, tanning, and speculating about the Bachelor's intentions. They meet the Bachelor in one-to-one and group activities. Each week the Bachelor gives a rose to the women who will continue to compete, and two who do not receive a rose go home. (If you're a more faithful viewer than I am, please email me with corrections!) So what can we learn about career reality from this reality show? The Bachelor - a popular reality TV show - offers an example of how we absolutely, positively should not make career decisons. Premise: A very eligible Bachelor (last season featured an NFL quarterback) stays in a mansion with several eligible young women. They seem to spend their days swimming, tanning, and speculating about the Bachelor's intentions. They meet the Bachelor in one-to-one and group activities. Each week the Bachelor gives a rose to the women who will continue to compete, and two who do not receive a rose go home. (If you're a more faithful viewer than I am, please email me with corrections!) So what can we learn about career reality from this reality show? The Bachelor - a popular reality TV show - offers an example of how we absolutely, positively should not make career decisons. Premise: A very eligible Bachelor (last season featured an NFL quarterback) stays in a mansion with several eligible young women. They seem to spend their days swimming, tanning, and speculating about the Bachelor's intentions. They meet the Bachelor in one-to-one and group activities. Each week the Bachelor gives a rose to the women who will continue to compete, and two who do not receive a rose go home. (If you're a more faithful viewer than I am, please email me with corrections!) So what can we learn about career reality from this reality show? 1. Walk out the front door of your comfort zone. From the women's perspective, The Bachelor is a metaphor for the wrong kind of job hunting. Whenever you're one of a group chasing the same dream, it's difficult to create a realistic game plan and use energy efficiently. But they're chosen to compete and it's so easy to get caught up in the game. Career changers, of course, aren't stuck in a mansion with a single prize, however dazzling. Like the contestants, though, they can get awfully comfortable. Better to walk out the front door and keep looking until you recognize your true goal and the ink is dry on the offer letter. 2. Prepare for irrational rejection. If you choose to stay and compete, remember that the decision-maker is looking for reasons to eliminate options because there are just too many choices to evaluate rationally. Interviewers overwhelmed by hundreds of resumes often can find an adequate choice from the first fifty ­ or from any fifty chosen at random. You can't read anything into rejection except the laws of probability and randomness. 3. Look through the windows: there's a world outside! When you're caught up in an intense contest, it's easy to forget there's more than one race in the world and certainly more than one prize. And I believe everyone should pursue multiple goals at the same time. It sounds time-consuming, but usually you can achieve synergies by creative planning. You learn how to pursue one goal by striving after another. And most important, you're likely to come out a winner. 4. Recognize that choices look different when you're on deadline. From the Bachelor's perspective, there are pluses and minuses to this series of forced decisions. First, it's easy to procrastinate when you face a tough decision. A deadline often clarifies options and actually makes the choice easier. But when you're facing a complex decision with consequences that last for years, where a mistake can be costly, it's best to take more time. 5. Don't anticipate the final decision until the ink is dry on the contract. Nothing happens until you get the offer in writing. In one episode, the Bachelor took two different finalists to the same jewelry store to look at engagement rings! Even after you've looked at rings together, the show seems to say, you're not even engaged to be engaged. (We won't go into the ethical dimensions of these actions in the context of romance. But would you want to accept a rose ­ or a ring ­ from someone who just went through the same process with a different potential partner?) I've heard first-hand accounts of verbal offers that were withdrawn or materially changed by the time they were translated to writing. And even written offers can be withdrawn for sufficient reason. During times of stress, people make promises they don't intend to keep, and others hear promises that were never intended to go beyond light banter. Bottom Line: It's no accident that Bachelor match-ups seem to fall apart when the season ends. And it's no accident that great decisions lead to empowering, satisfying, meaningful lives. Career Consultant Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D. created the 21-Day Extreme Career Makeover guide for midlife professionals who want to transform career breakdowns to career breakthroughs. Get started here. Download your fr*e Report: Why Most Career Change Fails (and how to write your own success story) Sign up now.

[Career information] An end to the crystal ball

Q. “Time for a career change! I’ve got a terrific idea for a service targeted to first-time home buyers and real estate agents. And I’ve got a year’s salary in the bank. “My friends say, ‘Go for it!’ But my business advisor warns, ‘If the real estate market slows down, your idea won’t work.’ How can I forecast the real estate market?” A. Did you hear a crashing sound? That was my crystal ball, shattering. Believe me, if I could predict markets, I would be writing this ezine from a penthouse in Trump Tower. A limo would be idling on the street, waiting to drive Gracie and me to an elite dog park... Back to reality. When you can’t predict events but you need to protect your future, your question shifts from “What will happen?” but “What would I do if X happens?” Let’s face it: Sometimes we need to carry an umbrella even if the sun is shining and we have an “all clear” forecast. (1) How well do you know your target market? Clients who consider starting a business usually worry about getting a business license, finding health insurance and accumulating capital. Sure, these areas are important. But what you really need are customers. In my experience, success comes most easily to those who speak the language of their target market and have direct access to potential customers. For example, you could be prominent in the real estate community. Or you might be an accountant or marketing pro with many clients in the real estate field. (2) What are your red, green and yellow lights? Once an investor said, “I can’t predict the devaluation of the dollar. But I have identified the maximum tolerable devaluation that I can handle. If the dollar goes below that level, I know what actions I will take.” You can do the same. Each business (and each job) will have different benchmarks. But you can decide ahead of time when you will pull out, invest more aggressively, or slow down. (3) What is your Plan B? What is your most pessimistic scenario? And what will you do? “I can always go back to my current career” is not a Plan B. Ideally, I recommend running your Plan B parallel to your new venture, for at least six months to a year. Plan B’s include (but are not limited to) a spouse’s job, second business or part-time income stream. (4) Can you test the waters? Often you can start on a small scale, part time basis to see if the market is ready for your idea. More important, you also decide if you like your new world. If you’re not competing with your employer, you may be able to get an unpaid leave of absence to test your venture. These sabbaticals are rare, and you have to be careful with the way you phrase your request. But it happens. (5) Have you cast a wide enough net? When it’s time for a change, you probably have to consider a move. In my experience, frustrated workers tend to experience physical symptoms. Some even sabotage their own success so they’re forced to find a new career. Few professionals have just one (and only one) passion. And once you begin exploring, you will find alternative paths to career success and fulfillment. Trouble making decisions? Visit Grab my non-woo-woo guide to intuition. Or consider some consultations.